We just received an email from a website that stated that Martha Stewart was looking for properties to send her their “Mancation” packages to feature on her show. We don’t usually post specials on our blog, but we thought it was entertaining enough to lay it on ya, “disclaimer” and all.
Her goes nothin’…
Alright boys, MAN UP! You’ve taken out the garbage, driven the kid to football practice, told your wife how good she looks in those jeans–you’ve done it all right. Now it’s time to grab the guys, head out to Cape Cod and have a little fun. The Lamb and Lion Inn “Mighty Cape Cod He-Man Package” is a mancation custom built for 4 guys looking for 5 days of fun, quality chill-time and a bit of ever-important knuckle dragging.
DAY 1: Check into the Inn. You’ll all be staying in the 1740 Barn! Spread out, enjoy the fire (fire goood!), and kick back in your living room. There will be our “Hunka, Hunka Burnin’ Love” welcome basket awaiting which consists of cold Cape Cod Beer, frosty beer mugs, bags of Cape Cod Potato Chips and other local munchies you can crunch and spill all over the carpeting. Enjoy the Inn, swim in the pool and hot tub, and barbeque on your own back deck for dinner!
DAY 2: Wake-up late and have breakfast delivered to the Barn. Once up, it’s time to hit the links! An early afternoon tee-time for 4 will be awaiting you at the award-winning Hyannis Golf Club, just minutes from the Lamb and Lion Inn. After golf, enjoy the pool and hot tub back at the inn (we’ll light a fire in the courtyard fireplace (fire, very gooood!). Enjoy transportation to and from our local Tavern for the Cape’s best chowder, burgers, seafood, pasta and steaks! After dinner it’s back to your Barn deck for a complimentary nightcap!
DAY 3: Wake up even later and enjoy another scrumptious breakfast delivered to the Barn. Complimentary transportation will deliver you to nearby Barnstable Harbor where your kayaks await. Spend a few leisurely hours paddling around the harbor and the beaches of Sandy Neck. A sack lunch of weighty sandwiches and “adult sodas” will make the afternoon complete. Back to the Inn for some down time by the pool and hot tub. Later that night the Inn’s surround-sound home theater “Man Cave” will be reserved for you where you can all watch the best movie ever made, JAWS, and gorge on the best chicken wings and ribs on Cape Cod (never mind a bigger boat–we may need a bigger couch).
DAY 4: The next morning, after another delicious and delivered breakfast, it’s time to avenge Captain Quint and hit the high seas for a half day of sport fishing out of nearby Barnstable Harbor. Fishing our local Cape Cod waters practically guarantees you a cooler full of fresh, flappin’ fish, so for tonight it’s back to the Barn deck to fire up the grill and show those fish where they belong in the food chain.
DAY 5: Day 5 has been carefully orchestrated to ensure you DO NOTHING! After breakfast, hang around the inn and enjoy the down time you fantasize about while at your desk. Chill by the pool, hang around the Barn, laugh and enjoy. Our massage therapists will be on site for four 1-hour massages in the Lamb and Lion Inn’s spa. Want to take an afternoon ride along historic Old Kings Highway? We’ll furnish you with our very own self-guided driving tours. Want to hit the sports bar for the big game? We know where the best ones are. The local brewery and chip factory? Minutes away. Want to learn how to dig oysters & clams? We’ve got you covered. Go out, stay in, we don’t care! They’ll be no chores, no phone calls from your boss (or from your employees) and no errands to run. Have a good night’s sleep and get ready to return to the grind. Breakfast will be served before you depart.
So that’s what we sent in. Let’s see if Martha deems it air-able. Oh yea, if you know anyone who might fit the bill, this 5-day getaway is only $3,850.00 (that’s under $200 per person, per day!). All taxes are included, but gratuities are not. When booking just make sure you add the code: BNBFINDERMS